I am in a European country, connected to a building that is remniscent of an old hotel. Up and down the stairs... am I connected to a building next door? I know a girl who works in the hotel behind the reception desk. She tells me that the nazis are coming tomorrow and have a list of of students marked for execution - this affects me too (though I cannot remember if I am a student or not). I am terrified. I had been aware of the growing nazi problem - but thought I would have more time. I must leave the area immediately! - But to where? More back and forth between hotels and other buildings.... are there some meetings with a member of some resistance, one who may be able to get me safe passage to the UK? Where will I get money from? Food? I have a vision of myself trying to sleep in some kind of marshy area. The idea is not appealing.
***
I am in a large house - it is daylight. Tiger, our old cat, is there, seeking some kind of 'lighthearted revenge' on me for some forgotten slight. I lie on the settee in the living room, suddenly aware of how large the house is, how many rooms and stairs... and Tiger is out there somewhere -waiting to jump out on me, I hear a beeping sound. I know (or do I see) it is a 'Rom The Spaceknight' toy from the 1970s - Tiger has let this one walk free. It's mechanical walk is unnerving - as is it's red eyes.
Tuesday, 28 November 2017
Friday, 24 November 2017
Back To Southside Again (Night of 23/11/2017)
I am on holiday back in Kinloss again. I am only here for few days - the details are uncertain. I find myself at the junction of Wester Road and North Road, looking past the fence that lines Southside and across the farmers fields that surrounds the housing estate. It is twilight - grey skies and darkening light - and to my joy I espy a cluster of streetlights just turned on - glowing that deep, rich night-time red when they first come on, before warming up to their bright orange. It is that sacred time - when day becomes night, according to John Burnside - and I am back in that childhood place where that time is most sacred. I notice that the streetlamps are not lining a road but are actually in the fields themselves. I want to take a photograph of them and take out my phone, but am disappointed to discover some kind of manual worker in the fields. I feel too self conscious to take any photographs - and am unsure whether I would be allowed so I head on.
I walk back to 66 Abbey Crescent where I used to live - I notice that many of the streetlights are now casting that modern beige light and am slightly disappointed. I think my Dad is at 66, but am not sure... he doesn't appear in the dream. I speak on the phone with Phil or Steve - friends from secondary school. I think we are arranging one or both of them picking me up. 66 is largely empty - it has the feel of rooms not used for a long time. A goth girl who lives there greets me - she seems to be busy. I see her in another room cuddled up to her boyfriend on the sofa, who seems disappointingly normal.
I am aware of the night outside the windows. I look with wonder at the gloomy murk that was once the playground outside my childhood home.
I walk back to 66 Abbey Crescent where I used to live - I notice that many of the streetlights are now casting that modern beige light and am slightly disappointed. I think my Dad is at 66, but am not sure... he doesn't appear in the dream. I speak on the phone with Phil or Steve - friends from secondary school. I think we are arranging one or both of them picking me up. 66 is largely empty - it has the feel of rooms not used for a long time. A goth girl who lives there greets me - she seems to be busy. I see her in another room cuddled up to her boyfriend on the sofa, who seems disappointingly normal.
I am aware of the night outside the windows. I look with wonder at the gloomy murk that was once the playground outside my childhood home.
Wednesday, 22 November 2017
Back To Family Investments Again (Night of 22/11/2017)
I have gone back to work at Family Investments. It is very strange seeing old work colleagues - people do not seem that surprised to see me back again. I seem to do a lot of sitting around on benches waiting for meetings and training sessions to begin. In the old call centre - it is all different - people sitting on low benches whilst on the phones. I make friends with a new girl. We head off to a place she knows - connected with the Family Investments building. It is some kind of watery harbour area - a feeling of somewhere secret. Sunlight. Are we meant to be here? A vague feeling the girl is connected with angling somehow.
4 dreams from a night in autumn 2016 I had forgotten about
1.
Part of some occult team carrying out rituals. Henry Barratt Taylor. A way of raising power by each member laying their hand on tiop of one another which is above a flame. There is some kind iof mentor there. He tells us that after the ritual is over that we must engage in some kind of everyday activity - otherwise our imaginations may get out of hand - something that he calls 'instant whispers'
2.
In a house I am living in with my parents - behind my bed I discover a door. I open the door and discover a small cupboard. There is a narrow stairway that leads to my parents room below.
3.
In a room that is filled with water. holding my breath. Kath is there. She can hold her breath longer than me. She reads a books underwater. I look at her - she looks beautiful and mermaid-like. I keep having to swim up to the top of the room, and breathe in the two inches of air near the ceiling. Eventually I get sick of this and leave the room, climbing up some stairs to some kind of landing. My laptop is there - I go on some kind of black metal forum - a girl is thanking members for how she is treated.
4.
I get given some money from the king. I say thank you very much Mr Lannister Sir. He is angry with my thanks and says 'too much!' He looks at my money and takes a twenty back to throw in the bin.
Part of some occult team carrying out rituals. Henry Barratt Taylor. A way of raising power by each member laying their hand on tiop of one another which is above a flame. There is some kind iof mentor there. He tells us that after the ritual is over that we must engage in some kind of everyday activity - otherwise our imaginations may get out of hand - something that he calls 'instant whispers'
2.
In a house I am living in with my parents - behind my bed I discover a door. I open the door and discover a small cupboard. There is a narrow stairway that leads to my parents room below.
3.
In a room that is filled with water. holding my breath. Kath is there. She can hold her breath longer than me. She reads a books underwater. I look at her - she looks beautiful and mermaid-like. I keep having to swim up to the top of the room, and breathe in the two inches of air near the ceiling. Eventually I get sick of this and leave the room, climbing up some stairs to some kind of landing. My laptop is there - I go on some kind of black metal forum - a girl is thanking members for how she is treated.
4.
I get given some money from the king. I say thank you very much Mr Lannister Sir. He is angry with my thanks and says 'too much!' He looks at my money and takes a twenty back to throw in the bin.
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